I have lost ALOT of friends in the last few years. I have realized that I am one of those girls that people are friends with (in general) because its convenient. Yes, I have some friends who are clear exceptions but for the most part that is how things have worked for me.
Even people I have called my best friends in the past few years dont talk to me, unless I start up a conversation. I have lost so many friends. And I am SO hurt. and SO angry. I'm done with people who make me start all conversations. If they really wanted to talk to me, they could have started a conversation too. Its a two way street.
I am tired of starting all the conversations. I dont feel important to anyone anymore. I'm not important enough to start a conversation with. I dont need to be the one to always say the first words. Its nice sometimes, but I'm tired of living on one way streets.
I have learned that my close friends think I'm important, but I'm tired of feeling unimportant to everyone else. I give up. If you dont want to start a conversation, you clearly dont want to talk to me. I get that. I just give up caring so much.
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2 comments:
I dunno... I think you underestimate the amount of friends that you have. Maybe you're right that some people are only friends with you when it's convenient, but I'm also sure that you make a strong impression on everyone you meet.
Besides, having a couple close friends is better than a ton of sort-of friends anyway.
Love you
You have some very deep strong personal friendships that will last a lifetime. There is always an ebb and flow. That's the way life works.
Sometimes, you have to decide if being the one to reach out is such a bad thing. Maybe the person on the other end feels the same way and simply needs to know they matter to someone too.
V-P is right...a few close friends is golden.
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